Preached · August 14, 2013
Series · Foolproofing Your Life
Text · Proverbs 13; Proverbs 13.20
The Passage
We're in the series "Foolproofing Your Life," week two. Last week we talked about the difference between the naive and the fool and the mocker. This week we want to talk about one way in particular to avoid becoming a fool.
So if you have your Bibles, your iPads, your Kindles, your iPhones, your Android devices, pull them out and find your way to the book of Proverbs chapter 13, verse 20. It will also be up on the screen. And if you happen to have the YouVersion Bible app, we have what's called Live Events up there — it's this great thing about the 21st century that you could literally fall asleep and then get on that app and find all my notes, so you wouldn't have to miss anything. This is the space age, folks. Welcome. It's exciting stuff.
So, Proverbs 13:20. First we're going to explore the actual words and message of this proverb. Then we're going to explore two biblical examples of how this proverb works out. And then we'll finally talk about how it applies directly to our lives.
This is what it says — this is from The Message paraphrase, which I think actually nails it pretty well:
Become wise by walking with the wise. Hang out with fools and watch your life fall to pieces.
The Two Verbs
The first thing I want us to notice about this proverb are the two main verbs, the action words: "walking" and "hang out." The first verb, "to walk," is one we've explored before, if you kindly remember. It's one of the favorite words of the author of Deuteronomy, and it shows up a lot in the Psalms — phrases like "I walk in the Lord's ways," "walk in the path that the Lord your God has shown you," "walk with God." In the Psalms, David or the other psalmists will say, "I've walked your paths continually," or, "I desire to walk with you." It's a word associated with being on a road, or a journey, or a path. And through that journey or path, though it may have an ultimate destination, often it doesn't seem that the point is the destination, but rather the walking with God — to enjoy his very presence, to follow him wholly and completely.
So when we see a proverb that says, "Become wise by walking with the wise," the author is not talking about a new YMCA fitness routine, but rather a lifestyle — a long-term process of walking, abiding, and staying in contact with. (I think every sermon would be better with Richard Simmons.)
Our second verb, "hang out," is a little bit harder to nail down. In some translations you might have "companion" or "befriend." But the way it's used in Scripture is almost always negative when it's used in this kind of way. It can refer to hanging out with violent men, or with prostitutes or gluttons or idiots. There's this sense that the befriending, or companionship, or hanging out that is happening is fleeting, pleasure-seeking, and self-centered. It's like those people we all know who hang out with us not for the joy of hanging out with us, but because they want something out of it. The first person in our proverb is walking with the wise: it's patient; they're willing to go slow. The companion of fools, the second person, however, wants something out of it — something that feels good, and something that feels good right now.
So here's how I would paraphrase our proverb this morning:
When you live among wise people, not in a rush but purposefully, don't be surprised to see yourself becoming like those wise people — and that's a good thing. But when you get all chummy (chummy is still a word, right?) with foolish people with no inhibitions, no maturity, no wisdom, expect to end up just like them: in constant trouble.
Or, in short: your life is shaped by who you spend your time with.
Watch Your Life Fall to Pieces: Rehoboam
So let's give two examples from Scripture. In the book of 1 Kings chapter 12, we come across the story of Rehoboam. His father was Solomon, and Solomon's now dead, so Rehoboam is the new king of Israel. The leaders of the nation are gathered together to hear what Rehoboam is going to do as king. The leader of the northern regions comes to Rehoboam and says, "Hey, Solomon, your father, was great and all, but he just about worked the people to death with all of his nation-building and battles and temple-building. So is there any chance, O king, that you might let up a little bit? Give the people a break." And Rehoboam says, "Give me three days and I'll think about it; I'll get back to you."
So King Rehoboam goes and asks advice from his father's advisors, the older men who had served with Solomon for decades. Their response to the king is, "If you're willing to be their servant today, they will be your loyal subjects forever." But Rehoboam thinks he can find better advice, so he rejects the advice of his dad's older counselors, and he goes to his friends who he has grown up with and has promoted to be his advisors. And this is the advice they give, in verse 10:
This is what you should tell those complainers who want a lighter burden: "Yes, my father laid heavy burdens on you, but I'm going to make them even heavier. My father beat you with whips, but I will beat you with scorpions."
To which we all give a collective "yikes." But this is what King Rehoboam decides to follow as advice. So he goes back to the leader of the northern region and says, "Eh, I think I'm going to beat you with scorpions." And surprise, surprise, the northern region rebels. Suddenly our not-so-wise king is left with half the amount of territory, taxes, and people. D'oh.
So what happened? It's exactly what the author of our proverb thought would happen. Rehoboam made companions with fools and watched his life fall to pieces. The son of the king who had brought the nation to its heights — this son split the nation apart.
This history lesson highlights one of the nuances of our proverb this morning: that just because we've spent years and years with someone for a long, long time — in Rehoboam's case, all his life — does not automatically mean those long-term friends are the wisest people in our lives. Just as we discussed last week, the wisest question, the best question we can ask about the decisions we're making in our lives, is, "Is it wise?" And in the same way, the best question we can ask about our mentors and advisors and companions and confidants is, "Are you wise?" We'll talk more about this later.
Walk with the Wise: The Disciples
A great illustration of walking with the wise comes from Jesus's disciples. In Luke chapter 5, we have this great report of Jesus walking alongside a lake, being pressed in by a crowd who is just dying to hear him preach. Wouldn't that be great? And Jesus does what any normal person would do when lots of people want to hear you preach: he gets in a fishing boat. He meets this guy named Simon and convinces him, "Hey, would you mind rowing me out a little bit, and I'll preach from the boat?" So Simon does so, and Jesus preaches to the crowd for a while.
Finally, once he's done and the crowd begins to dissipate, I suspect Jesus is maybe a little bit hungry at this point. So Jesus tells Simon, the guy with the boat, "Hey, cast your nets; try to catch some fish." Now, Simon is the professional fisherman. You can almost hear him grumble: "What does this preacher know about fishing?" But he decides to give this guy Jesus a chance, and he throws his nets overboard, maybe a little bit annoyedly. But as they begin to lift their nets, Simon realizes they're so full that he calls over a second boat — as this great painting illustrates — to help them pull in all the fish. And we pick up the report in Luke chapter 5, verse 8:
When Simon realized what had happened, he fell to his knees before Jesus and said, "Oh, Lord, please leave me. I'm too much of a sinner to be around you." But Jesus replied to Simon, "Don't be afraid. From now on, you'll be fishing for people." And as soon as they landed, Simon and his companions left everything and followed Jesus.
And so, for Peter and eventually many, many others, they begin this years-long journey of being with Jesus. The disciples quite literally walked with the wise, with Jesus, who according to 1 Corinthians is the very embodiment of wisdom. Much of the Gospels tell of the foolishness of these disciples, of all the mistakes they make. But by the time we get to the book of Acts, they've been filled with the Holy Spirit and start to show signs that they are wise.
Now, make no doubt: what Peter did was difficult. He had a job, a family, and friends. No doubt some of those friends thought that what he had done — abandoning his fishing business to follow a preacher — was the very epitome of foolishness. But wisdom is sometimes difficult to recognize. It is not always the obvious thing. The obvious thing is to not let some preacher onto your fishing boat, and certainly not to let him tell you how and when to throw your nets. But the first act of wisdom we can all engage in is the humility to say — and to quote Billy Joel completely out of context — "You may be right; I may be crazy."
Application
So let's ask ourselves some application questions.
The first question is: Who are we walking with? In other words, who are the people in our lives that are shaping us as a person? Make a list. Don't bother yet judging the quality of those people — good or bad, wise or foolish — but I would encourage us all to make an inventory of those people in our lives who influence us on a daily, weekly, monthly basis. Who are the people in our lives that have influence on us?
After we've done that, the second question is: Who in that list is wise? We may need a little help with this, because we may not be the best judge of wisdom ourselves. But certainly we can find one person we can confidently say is wise, and they can help us think through who in our lives, in our circles of influence, is wise — is actually somebody we'd want to influence us.
And the third question, then, is: How can I walk more often with wise people? Here's where we begin to talk about how we're spending our time and who we're spending it with. Now, maybe some of you are thinking, "I spend most of my time with my kids, and they're idiots." First of all, we don't use the "idiot" word around here. Secondly, that's not what I'm talking about — we're talking about peers, or those older than us. Who in our peer group, or older, are we spending our time with? Who of that group is wise? And how can I spend more time with them?
Now, this is actually why we as a church think that small groups, missional communities, things like the Journey, are important. We don't have these apprenticeship practices just so we can count heads and report numbers and pat ourselves on the back. No — what we as the staff and leadership of this church earnestly desire for each and every one of you and us is to be formed into apprentices, disciples of Jesus, to do what Simon and his friends did: leave the boats and follow him. And much of that is long-term. It's walking. Long-term, slow apprenticeship processes. Patiently walking alongside the wise.
So we make a list of those who influence us. We figure out in that list who among them is wise. And then we figure out how we can spend more time with them; we reprioritize our lives and our time.
And the final question we ask ourselves — and I leave this last on purpose — is: What companions are in our lives that are shaping us toward foolishness and destruction? Now, honestly, I think it's pretty rare that Scripture gives us warrant to completely cut people out of our lives. Jesus quite frequently spent time with foolish, unwise people. However, the difference was that he was not influenced by them. So that's the question we're asking: Who has influence in our lives that, quite frankly, they just shouldn't? And how can we put that unhealthy influence to an end? For some of us, that may mean a complete cutoff from friends, or, even more painfully, a certain family member. But I think for a lot of us, what it means is simply less time spent with that person, and certainly less advice asked for from that person. But I encourage you to remember: you don't need to walk through these things alone. You walk through it with someone who is wise.
Conclusion: Walking with Wisdom Himself
Ultimately, our highest desire is to walk with wisdom himself, Jesus Christ. He is the author and the perfecter of our faith, the one we should pattern our lives after. So for those of us who have already begun our journey with Jesus, we need to be continually asking the Holy Spirit for help in continuing that walk. And for those of us who have yet to begin that journey, you have an invitation to start that journey today. If you'd like to talk to someone about those first steps you can take in walking with wisdom, there's a team of people who would love to talk and pray with you in our prayer chapel.
I'm going to go ahead and invite the worship team to come forward. One way in which we can continue walking with Jesus, walking with wisdom himself, is by the sacrament of communion, the Lord's Supper. In communion, we take up the bread and the juice, and we are reminded that God incarnate — wisdom walking around with skin — came to earth to redeem us so that we could be his people.
So together, let's stand. We're going to spend some time singing, preparing ourselves for communion with Jesus, preparing ourselves for walking with wisdom. Let's prepare our hearts for this wonderful and beautiful mystery we are about to partake in.
This is a transcript of the sermon as preached, lightly edited for readability.
