This week marks the 2 year anniversary since the death of my brother David in a car accident. Grief is something that we all face ill-prepared. We do our best to sanitize death, distance ourselves from it, and avoid the emotions related to it. Even the word grief isn't enough. There is more than one emotion related to death and loss, and yet it seems English speakers couldn't be bothered to come up with more than one word.
Anyway I wanted to link to some books that have been helpful to me over the years.
LAMENT FOR A SON, Nicholas Wolterstorff
"If he was worth loving, he is worth grieving over. Grief is existential testimony to the worth of the one loved. That worth abides."
A GRIEF OBSERVED, C. S. Lewis
"Talk to me about the truth of religion and I'll listen gladly. Talk to me about the duty of religion and I'll listen submissively. But don't come talking to me about the consolations of religion or I shall suspect that you don't understand.”
EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON AND OTHER LIES I'VE LOVED, Kate Bowler
“I read an article about how people in grief swear because they feel the English language has reached its limit in a time of inarticulate sorrow. Or at least that is what I tell people when I am casually dropping f-bombs over lunch as I explain the mysteries of Lent.”
GOD CAN'T, Thomas Jay Oord
"Worse, is God waiting for us to beg, plead, or get our acts together before intervening? Does God say, 'I won’t heal until you’ve said eighty-seven more prayers?'"
This Reddit Post on Grief Like Waves https://www.reddit.com/r/Assistance/comments/hax0t/my_friend_just_died_i_dont_know_what_to_do/c1u0rx2/
An Article on Relief After A Loved One Dies (not related to my brother, but related to those who perhaps battled a long illness) https://whatsyourgrief.com/relief-after-a-death-the-unspoken-emotion/